im too lazy to blog

fun dirty fact 1 : A mute couple got married recently . Due to their inability to speak , communication is hard for them . The wife came up with an idea , she wrote to her husband saying if he want to have sex later at night before sleep , grab her right boob . If he dont want , grab her left boob. And then, the husband replied by writing, "If you wan to have sex, stroke me batang once . if you dont want to have sex, stroke my batang 100 times" 

fun dirty fact 2 : A girl got a bee stucked in her vagina (dont ask me why, ppl tell me this joke) . The boyfriend went to the doctor with her. Doctor took a look at it and told them his plans. He was going to put some honey on his batanghead and try to lure the bee out. While he was doing this IN AND OUT, things got awkward. The doctor start doing it faster and even grabbing her boob. Sensing some problem, the boyfriend asked the doctor "What the fuck are you doing?" and so the doctor replied. "Change of plan, i'm going to drown the bee" 

PS: these jokes are provided by a very "chickenbreast" friend of mine . its not my joke . plus you need some brain to actually get the joke . tq 

today is the day i became a HERO !

yes i know i look like joker even back then . 

most people will wonder why today i became a hero ? the answer is simple . i fought my way to the very end . and won the battle . i swam the fastest . I BEAT ALL THOSE FELLOW SPERMA! which basically means today is my birthday . the day i kena shit out . 

ngam ngam 12 . my phone non stop ringing . but the first one was my girl . her timing chun . but i really terharu gila babeng . cause all those i never expect to wish me , did wish me . thanks for all the wishes babes =) 

thanks to madeliene, FATregas, jocelyn, evelynn, houzhi, houren, kent, khai hong, mok, spy, kiwei, piksan, siti, roxzanne, danielle, kevin, meisan, teresa, goldfish, airin, sister, jenai, minli and oiyee ! these are the ones who messaged me ! thanks =) 

HAPPY BIRTHDAYS !

KOAY YEE VEN AKA PAOPAO
MOK LIP BIN AKA MOKKY BALBOA

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to two of my bestfriend MOKKY BALBOA and PAOPAO . Mok Lip Bin and Koay Yee Ven actually . went ou with them . had a great day . nothing much to blog . next time !

holy ... cow

ahhh fcuker . back pain . been feeling so since last 2 weeks . thought it'll recover . mayb i shud stop futsal for a while =/ i dont wanna be cripple and stay infront of the comp and blog all day long . thats fcuking lifeless . ahh another interesting fact , i learned how to make homemade bombs thru youtube and yet to try it out =/ . 

bye mofakas .

P.S : back pain laaa . cant really sit here for long =/ pray im fine . 

awesome + friends = kuwakness

elvin gavin houren ( do not ask why the fcuk my hair look like that ) too short 
pik san and i ! 
gavin and houren .
INI AKU . SUPRAMAN
yee ven . the sohem kuwakchai . 
kuwakchai and kuwaklui 
the girls
splash effect
yesh me poser !
the gang ! lucky houren . 
subryne and elvin . 
the 3 kuwakchais
she's not posing . she's actually shouting for her life cause there's one cockroach is below her . 
kuwak luis
see my expression + piksan = kena electrifRIED ( its actually some grass thinggie )

howdy! back for more ? =) last 2 days was pure awesomeness . sunday morning i woke up, khai hong fetched me to midvalley . just to hang out . see those cosplay . some look nice some look fcuking wadafak . pink hair . oh my . after that, we decided to watch movie . not much nice movie nowadays . thanks to SOO, we decided to watch painted skin . the show's storyline was okay la . but really slow . so i think SOO's review tipu people one =) . after the movie we went home . and then the fun begins ! went ag's DPC place at 9+ pm. upon reaching, subryne elvin soofrine was already there then were joined by piksan later . so long never see this bunch of kuwakchai and kuwaklui . aggie especially . she's busy all the time . cant really blame her . we hang out at her place . played some card game , drank some beers , had some good laughs and definately awesome time together ( we seldom have the time to meet up like this ) . all hungry around 3+ am . went kepong makan MEE BABI . fcuking sedap okay . den all went home and tidur .

the next day, by the time i wake up, was already 4+pm . piksan smsed me whether the swimming plan ON or not . no nid ask me one . this kuwak chai sure ON . what also ON oneee . holiday what . but then it started to rain . i dont care . i just went and fetch piksan soofrine and houren . fortunately, by the time we reach ag's place , rain stopped ! disitulah kelamenessan dan keso-high-nessan begins . after that we went makan dinner and all ciao . end of story . nabeh im like reporting my lifestyle to you all man . fcuker .

RAYA! not like im celebrating but im happy on behalf of those who are celebrating! selamat hari raya aidilfitri! sometimes i just wonder why racism occur among us . wadafak betul . chinese like to say malay racist . malay like to say chinese racist . sampai bila only can stop ? pandai skit boleh tak ? =) kick the fcuking racism out of us, then baru BEST ! but talk is cheap . easier said than done . its so true . sometimes i cant help but to be racist at times ( i admit, my bad ) .

JAY CHOU! yes i know there are people who dont like him . once again , fcuk off if you dont like what you're reading . like la i beg you to come . his album is going to be out soon ! his first debut song was awesome . encouraging people and ask people not to give up so easily . jeromefo ( long time jay chou fans with me ) asked if i pre-ordered the album which i usually will . but this time i didnt . not so excited already . people change i guess =) im more to football nowadays.  i got my dimitar berbatov no.9 jersey ! but its fake . yeah some of you fcukers thinking that im cheap . mayb i am . but i happy you happy ? i buy it just to wear during futsal . fake or real . takde differences la . moreover, if ori also people say fake . abit cha dou right . oh well . im cheap ^^ and im proud of it

whoah sometimes i got friends dam hebat one . they are those people who like to get fcuked ( literally) everyday . if not they'll feel uneasy .  this is what my friends ( courtesy of kuwakchais ) call , LOH DIU ( amik kongkek ) . but my friends can be unbelievable . they evolve very fast one . from LOH DIU become CHIONG DIU ( rampas kongkek ) . fcuking awesome wei . if you wanna ask how is chiong diu or loh diu like , ask people like chunsin and awyong ( sorry my fellow kuwakchais , i nid GOOD example you know ) . they talk crap out of a sudden when people is not even talking to them . like now , im skyping with lichin n kent n chunsin, this chunsin sing gay song and jolin tsai's song . what the fcuk ! . i came across this video in youtube . it'll briefly explain about what im saying . enjoy 

P.S : kuwak in my blog means TRICKY / SNEAKY . not gangsta . me no gangsta . 

Vroom Vroooooommmmm .... EKKKKKK . Guess who's back ?

Yes i know im random . first i quit . deleted the fcuking blog . but HERE AM I ! AGAIN ! IM BACK ! thanks to michelle yap wei MAE* (fcuker i always type MEI) . 

YESS LAAHHHH . finished exam . overall it was pretty okay . hopefully can get straight A's laaa . then can get monnehhh ! FCUKK LAAHHHHH . exam finished = fcuking bored . humans are really fan chin (in cantonese, i dont how the fcuk to explain in english) . when class is on , always want holiday , when holiday , always say bored . wtfbbq la . MICHELLE YAP . please pray that i get good results this semester so i can cheat my father some money to go aussie =) 

Anyway, what's happening to the world nowadays ? (fulamakatak i sound so superman-ish) . there are people who bring guns to unis and shoot the fcuk out of people (the finland massacre) . there are people who blackmail classmates to have sex with them (fcuking 16 years old!) . there are people who kidnap a 17 years old girl and killed her before asking for ransom (johor sad case) . there are people who are getting detained for crimes they did not commit (i dont wanna end up tio ISA) . there are people who try to promote unity by being racist (i dont wanna end up tio ISA again) . damn random la all this people . learn from the past laaa , sure mampos if continue like this . i know you all like to watch the dark knight , but dont la till wanna copy Joker live in a world without rules . 

WARNING! this is the part im supposingly to be emo (or am i ?) . get the fcuk away from my girlfriend laaaa . people couple already still wanna ask if you have a chance ? respect la brother . muka tembok macam wall of china . i know i might not look good or smart . i know some people think im lame . i know some people think i dont deserve her . heck , even some of my OWN friends never thought we'll last . every week ask me break up already or not . rofl . but u all CHUI MEH (in cantonese again, go learn la) . its my life ! any problem with it ? ill run you down with my tongsampah car . dont play play . i used to wear a shirt with "ONE girl friend is not enough" written over it . some girls say im unfaithful ? dont ge kiang (act smart , hokkien this time) . one girlfriend is not enough , BUT having my girl now , is MORE than enough . you dont know how much we love each other then shadap la . i know all this might sound very corny and yuk mah (cantonese, buy a cina dictionary pls) , but i told you . MY FCUKING LIFE , MY FCUKING BLOG, what you wanna complain about ? listen to the grandma (vid below)

Okehh . sudah finish the emo part . oh my brader's and sistah's bday all coming . all ramai ramai celebrate la okay ! cant wait . nowadays im addicted to futsal . one week 3 times . money also 3 times the faster habis . but oh well =) . thanks for spending your time reading my fcuking blog =) 

p.s : i am NOT a uneducated person . the vulgarity in this post is meant to describe the actual feeling im feeling which words cant really express . its like when u scratched your leg , you'll say PAIN WEH . but when u break ur leg and the bone stick out of ur skin, you'll say FCUKING PAIN WEH . you'll get the idea =)  . 

this video is awesome